Can I just say how refreshing it is of how outspoken the women of this generation are? I’ve learnt more from the shared experiences of people than in the four walls of any class room.
Recently, a 31 year old on twitter (@ahbiola) shared about going through early menopause and hypertension. An account (@instablog9ja) had brought it from twitter to Instagram, where I saw it and clicked to read the comments. Apart from a few ill-mannered people, whose gender you already know commenting on what they don’t know (intense eye roll), it was filled with other women either relating to her experience or dropping a prayer for her. But there was a comment that struck me by another lady (@aubiergembock) who said “Can we normalise conversations like this. Women are constantly suffering in silence. Many women are battling with early menopausal depression, PCOS, cervical dysfunction, prolonged periods, breast cancer scares, ovarian cysts, and many more. Not to mention the severe depression that comes from having miscarriages and people constantly asking women “when are you getting pregnant?” and I honestly couldn’t agree more because I know many women across the various issues she highlighted. While I’m happy for the women’s day luncheons and empowerment programs that litter the social scene these days, much more needed are conversations that relate to the everyday struggle of womanhood and ageing.
I can never forget having lunch with a couple of newly wedded friends where someone had shared dealing with recurring thrush from her contraceptive method and another reiterated “me too” launching the table into the discovery of how your body betrays you when you turn 30, the normalisation of thrush infections from no particular trigger and discovering something new every 3-5 business days. At that table, another lady shared of how she got a thrush infection when she first had sex with her husband and being a virgin, she was alarmed and didn’t know what to do. Luckily, because she shared she got the comfort of knowing that some women react to their significant other’s sperm as a result of their pH balance being thrown off course. I’m not even going to delve into the conversations that were had on sex and libido at that launch (err, @paulg on twitter, please this is not chatgpt. Thanks).
It’s also on social media that I’ve learnt the joys of motherhood or dare I say pregnancy and I mean that in the most ironic way. There’s a lady with a list on TikTok of reasons why she won’t be having kids, which she updates regularly when she makes a new horrific discovery from the women who are kind enough to share their experiences. It was from a friend I knew that some women could lose their teeth from pregnancy. Why? because throwing up a lot while pregnant can lead to the acid weakening your teeth’s enamel resulting in tooth loss. However, she only got that clarification when she tweeted it and another doctor explained the science behind it. Now, I don’t know about you but they did not tell me all these things in biology class or even pre-marital counselling oh.
I can relate the vulnerability and willingness to share by this generation of women to so many things from marital disappointments, sexual frustrations, reproductive health, abuse, finances, mental health, social injustices etc. My point is because you’ve shared, you’ve knowingly/unknowingly liberated another woman who is going through the same thing as you as well as enlightened another. Maybe it’s the fact that my personal motto is “you experience so you may grow, you share so others might learn” but to the women who share the good, the bad and the ugly, I see you, I respect you and I applaud you. Never stop speaking up and sharing, after all, there’s a reason soro soke became our generation’s motto in 2020.